Kids, I’m back and today, well, I’m feeling a little raw and vulnerable. My therapist says it’s because I’m too giving and that my passive-aggressive personality encourages people to take advantage of my good nature. He says that I should be more aggressive and less passive. Sadly, I am starting to agree with him.
September and August is always a hotbed of activity here at Inferno Corp. Not only is this the end of our fiscal year, it is also the season of annual reviews. Now, as I mentioned earlier, I am a bit of a micro-manager, so as you can imagine, I am quite busy at the moment reading and signing off on a lot of paperwork. Yesterday, while I was researching a Team Member’s review, I stumbled across the file of a recruit with great potential, who, I am dismayed to learn, has taken extreme measures to delay his employment start date. In effect, he is in breach of contract.
As you can imagine, I have heard it all: I want to be a writer. I want to be famous. I want to be the president of the U.S., so I can be a decider. I want to be the vice-president so I can rule the world. OK, I’m name-dropping on the last one, but he started it. I, after all, gave him what he wanted. He, in return, took advantage by having a fucking pacemaker put into his chest. I could end up holding the bag on this one for years! I should have known that he was not trustworthy from the start; too secretive if you ask me. I’ll have my lawyers pay him a little visit. A nice addendum to the contract should help persuade him to report to duty.
Sigh…deep breaths…relax…
Ohmmmmmm.
Alright, enough with him – I’ll wait as long as necessary. Besides, angry is not one of my personality traits. Moving on.
Remember the airline I purchased? Well, everything is running as planned; we have had two strikes, countless mechanical failures and daily delays are all the rage. I should be happy, right? Happy, happy, happy. Not! As usual, my competitor is hot on my heels. I just found out that “He” and his followers started their own airline! C’mon already! A little originality would be a nice change of pace. (Ok, so maybe there was some originality, but that was like, what, a million years ago?)
Ok Kids, I’m late; my therapist is waiting. Before I go however, allow me to present you with a bit of financial information – just in case you wish to invest in my company. I assure you, there is no better investment available, and the returns are guaranteed! Think about it. What investment do you know of that guarantees immediate fulfillment of your dreams?
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(INFERNO CORP, LLC (NasdaqGS: HELL)
Red= Daily Low
Blue= Daily High
Copyright© 2007 Mark B. Papale All rights reserved
Hello again,
I can’t believe I am actually feeling sympathy for this guy. Who knew that the Evil One needed a therapist!
Robin W
Evil One? He is a sentitive and caring man. Can’t you tell?
Thanks for coming back.
m
No credit crunch on this stock, good to see some companies haven’t bought bad loans.
Great idea btw, confessions of a CEO.
I assure you, we have a steady and plentiful cash flow. No funny business goin’ on at Inferno Corp!
Luc
Inferno Corp sounds like my kind of business. Bravo, sir.
Thank you, Lord! I wonder what Mr. Lincoln might think?
m
Devil’s Delight Mark, this was the Devil’s Delight.
amm
Thank you, Anita. I will be hosting a recruiting seminar at the Portland Hilton next month. Stop by if you are interested.
Luc
Dear Luc
I am SO there.